Zesty Enterprise » Snooty Catalogue Mocking

They make it so easy.

Jenny — Fri, 01 Dec 2006 21:10:30 +0000

This time of year, everyone’s in the market for just the right dress to wear to holiday functions. If you’re like me, you’ve combed through catalogues and examined multiple frocks online, from every possible angle.

If you’re JCrew, apparently, you’re convinced that we’ll all race to be the first to buy this limited edition, $1950.00 ball gown, even though you can only see it on this gal, sitting down, WEARING A HOODIE over the top.

Hurry! While supplies last.

More fun with catalogues

Jenny — Fri, 03 Nov 2006 22:17:00 +0000

You may have noticed I like to mock snooty catalogues. It’s so fun! You should try it. I’s a nice little activity when you know you can’t actually BUY anything from said catalogue.

This here is a cashmere covered hot water bottle found in the new Restoration Hardware.

This is a $15,000 couch, found in the same catalogue.

Now I ask you, what is a hot water bottle for? They’re for old drafty shacks. If Pa can’t be bothered to get up and stoke the fire, you take this here bag of hot water to bed with you so you don’t freeze to death in the middle of the night.

Do people who buy $15,000 couches also buy hot water bottles? Cashmere covered or no? Somehow I doubt it.

I just don’t understand.

Jenny — Fri, 29 Sep 2006 00:02:00 +0000

This old thing?
Originally uploaded by picture_ho.

How much do you think this skirt is? Go on, guess. When I played this game with SB, I could tell he thought he was guessing super high when he said $200.

It’s $1500. FIFTEEN HUNDRED DOLLARS.

This is what I don’t get. Do people who buy $1500 skirts even shop at jcrew? I sort of doubt it. If they do, maybe it’s like Target for them. Like, “Oh, I need a cheap new top to wear, I’ll just grab this $200 cashmere t-shirt. It’ll do.”

Starting ‘em young

Jenny — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 22:09:00 +0000

SB and I were perusing the Pottery Barn Kids catalogue last night when we saw something very disturbing:

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? Baby’s first Tiki Bar? Here is where your kid pretends to make drinks and then he pretends to get drunk!? Can you believe they sell such a thing? What’s next, Baby Beer Bongs? My First Shot Glass?

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Speaking of tiki bars and parentally sponsored drinking, SB and I have been invited to spend a week in a condo on the beach in Florida by his Dad and his wife, Sandy. I am such a brat for wishing it was in Miami, but it is actually Daytona Beach. I am hoping there is atleast one or two non-Nascar themed tiki bars there. These are republicans from Indiana, so of course, Daytona is their ideal beach vacation. I could care less, though, really. Anywhere there is a beach and sparkly water and an umbrella drink is okay by me. I am willing to keep my liberal yapp shut for 7 days, I can only hope our generous hosts can do the same. (though, with the joyous news of Libby fingering Bush in the leak scandal, I may need to bring some duct tape. :doesliberalhahadanceofjoy )
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Susie: Are you going to the Tiki Bar later?
Sally: Yeah, I was thinking about it. That bartender is totally HOT.